Message board topic:


re: Coasting

message 1 of 5
by » Tue Dec 25, 2018 03:39 pm

Thanks David.  I knew you were on your way to New Jersey and would be out of communication for a while.  Because of work, I can't get up there till January, unless I go up one day and come back the next.

Mom used to work incredibly hard to make Christmases special, (and huge) and this summer I told her how much I appreciated it.  It's a tradition I try to carry on.  Cheri's family has a tradition of doing everything Christmas Eve, so we had ours yesterday, and it was huge.  When the unwrapping was over, there was a pile of boxes, toys and wrapping paper that was easily knee high and covered all but a few feet of the living room floor.  I'm hoping our 5 year old granddaughter remembers Christmas the way I do and I absolutely love being Santa Claus.  John

re: Coasting

message 2 of 5
by » Tue Dec 25, 2018 02:22 am


I am so sorry. Also I am sorry I did not respons sooner, but I was flying all day to NJ. Now I am trying to prepare to go to the hospital tomorrow for Christmas and tonight I think I'll go to a midnight mass out here.

Enjoy the time you have with mom and let her know how you feel, though I am sure she knows. :) Give her a big hug and tell her Merry Christmas from us all here. :)



David and the CoolCyberCats

Forever in my heart

Cats Nap. Only Humans Put Them "To Sleep": Sterilize, Don't Euthanize!


re: Coasting

message 3 of 5
by » Mon Dec 24, 2018 04:56 pm

Thanks Peggy.  As recently as this summer Mom was still energetic and determined.  I followed her through a grocery store one day and could hardly keep up.  She was still driving and I rode with her a few times, noting that she was still driving just fine, even in the craziest of traffic.  In fact, she was still making occasional trips over to Rockford and down into southern Illinois.  She was always telling me about the yard work she was doing, pulling up weeds and piling up brush, which was way more than I bothered doing.

40 years is a long time to keep beating off cancer though and I think it was a fierce determination that kept her going.  She was driving herself to cancer radiation treatments.  (I had gone with her the time before last.)  There was only about a 4 inch curb that she had to step up on but that was when she fell, and that was the end of her independence.

I know everybody here has gone through or is going through variations of the same thing and I appreciate the understanding.  John

re: Coasting

message 4 of 5
by » Mon Dec 24, 2018 12:17 am

Oh, John, I'm reading your post with tears in my eyes.  I'm so keeping your dear mother in my thoughts and prayers.  Just enjoy every minute you are with her.   Praying for you too, John, to stay strong for her.  Know it's hard as I have been in your shoes.  (((hugs)))


Peggy, Laila and Angel Minchie


message 5 of 5
by » Sat Dec 22, 2018 06:35 pm

I can't imagine what you're going through with your mother, David.  It's a much different situation than mine and whatever else, I don't think I'd trade situations.  Mine however, not altogether unexpectedly, has taken a turn for the worse.

The cancer doctors wanted to continue treatments.  (You don't get paid if you don't treat.)  Other doctors however, have decided that particularly because of the broken hip, she's on a downhill slide and not recovering.  As a result, she's simply been sent home and now it's just a case of sitting back and waiting.  She'll most likely see Christmas and I'll probably try to be there Christmas day.  She told me weeks ago that she was just trying to see her next birthday, which is December 29.  That's one week from today.  I think she'll see her birthday but I'm not so sure she'll see January.

I had planned this last summer, to take at least one last Florida vacation with her.  Then of course, she got too sick to go.  Then she recovered, only to get sick again and there wasn't time to go.  So I had a big Christmas planned, as I knew she loved doing Christmas big.  Then she ended up in the nursing home.  Although she expected to get out Christmas Eve, I figured Christmas might not be quite as big as I'd expected.  Now I'll be surprised if she doesn't just sleep through it.

Her mother lived to 95 and I was hoping for something of a repeat performance, which would have left plenty of big Christmases and even a few trips to Florida, but none of that is going to happen.  She fought cancer off and on for half her life and I think it finally just wore her out, so that when she broke her hip, there just wasn't enough left to fight with.  John

Use: [New Colors] [Old Colors]